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author

It seems wrong to share this for the first time too close to Christmas because of its bleak subject matter. So have it now.

The bottom photo I think is ‘93. That jumper she is wearing is so 1990’s isn’t it? Bless❤️

When I did tell my son later that day, it was quite comical really. We were in this cafe, I was holding him, cuddling, coming out with this big monologue like a soap opera. I looked and he had fallen asleep in my arms. Must have bored the poor kid. 😂 Always something funny to be found, even in dark times.

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“Nothing’s the same as how it was. I’m glad I’m on the way out and not on the way in.”

That kind of epitomises how the older generation see the world, in a way they are preparing us for their departure by dropping subtle little cliches so when the time comes you will reflect on those words.

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author

Yes. The older I get I find myself saying the same things. Food doesn’t taste the same, can’t eat or drink this or that, things aren’t the same as when we were young. It’s as if the world really does fashion itself to the new bodies it wears.

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The simplicity of this is so poignant. Your ability to conjure up memories that aren’t even mine is incredible! I suppose it brings the fragments of my memories and puts them into some sort of sense.

Your Grandma had a long life, and you’re blessed to have happy memories of her 🥰

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author

Yeah, I didn’t want to put it on Facebook and have ghoulish relatives who normally never bother with me fake fawning, you know? Substack is my after hours lock in.

Yes she did have a long life and I was blessed to have her around so long and have her meet my son, she adored him.

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founding

“Anniversary Reactions” are a very real thing in mental health - partly because the sounds, sights, smells of the season act as anchors for emotions that arise repeatedly when triggered. Xmas is the worst for this because there are so many inescapable signifiers. It’s good that you can channel it into your writing.

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author

I had an unfortunate experience one Christmas Day too which I won’t go into now but I recently wrote a poem about too that I’ll put out at some point. Between the two, I just can’t get into it anymore.

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A fine poem Julie, always best written when heartfelt. Thank you.

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author

Thank you. I wrote that one a couple of weeks ago. Around this time of year it starts to come back to me.

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😓😓

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November 27, 2022
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author

We had many Christmases together, that’s the main thing. We all have to die and she was in her 90’s.

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